Wilde Freak (Rock Stars on Tour, #4) Read online

  “So, the two of you have been together for a long time,” the doctor said, interrupting my thoughts.

  “Not so long.” I gave him a wry smile. “I fell for her, but it took over ten years for her to return my feelings. I never thought we’d get together. For so many years, it seemed like an impossible dream. I can’t lose her now. Not after all of that.”

  The doctor smiled. “We’ll do everything we can, of course. Now, I’ll leave you to your singing.”

  I moved back close to Fiona and took her hand in mine again. Just like the doctor said, I kept singing. I couldn’t do much, but I could do that. I sang every song I knew. I sang until my voice went hoarse. Anything to keep her close to me.

  A nurse came in with lunch for me, so I took a break to eat it. Then I kept singing and talking until they came to take me back to my room.

  “Just a while longer,” I said.

  Before the nurse could answer, Fiona’s eyelids fluttered.

  “Did you see that?” I asked.

  The nurse nodded.

  “I can’t leave her now.”

  “It’s probably just her nervous system reacting. I don’t think she’ll be awake until tomorrow, at least.”

  She could say that, but Fiona had definitely reacted. She wanted me to stay with her. I knew that. She responded, and soon she’d be fully awake. All I could do was count my blessings that she’d come through this.

  Chapter 6: Matty

  THE NEXT MORNING, IT felt like this had always been my routine. Wake up, ask for news of Fiona, then get ready to go to see her. When Nurse Mary came in, she had some news for me, though.

  “You might be discharged soon,” she said. “The doctor mainly wanted you in here for observation, and since you’re never in your bed to observe, he’s kicking you out.” She grinned, amused at herself.

  “Oh,” I said. “I hadn’t really thought about that. I don’t have anywhere to go.”

  It felt stupid to say that. After all, I should’ve known my discharge would be coming soon, but my mind had been on other things.

  “Do you have friends, or anyone you know in Paris?” she asked. “You’ll get discharged sooner if you have someone to care for you.”

  Apart from a few record company people and the like, there was no one.

  I grimaced and shook my head. “Are there hotels near the hospital? I’ll need to be close by, and hotel staff are almost as good as friends to care for me.” I tried to give her an appealing grin. That line about hotel staff was a huge stretch.

  “We have printouts at the desk with a list of hotels that we give to family when someone’s admitted, but they aren’t fancy places. Nowhere near the standard you’d be used to.”

  I shrugged. “If they’re clean and close by, that’s all I need. Until Fiona’s out of here, I won’t be spending much time in my room.”

  “We can pick up the sheet when I wheel you upstairs,” she said. “But you might still need help with showering and getting dressed. I’d be happy to pop in and do that for you.”

  I laughed. “I think I’ll cope.” I got into the wheelchair.

  “Damn. I thought you rock stars were all man whores, but you only have eyes for her, don’t you?”

  “I sure do. She might wake up today,” I said.

  I’d miss Nurse Mary with her harmless flirting when I left this place. Some of the other nurses did their jobs and left, but she always sparkled with mischief.

  “She might wake, but even if she does, she’ll be groggy and confused. Don’t expect too much.”

  I nodded. Just seeing her awake would be enough.

  I sat beside her bed again, holding her hand and singing.

  “She’s getting stronger,” the doctor told me when he came in. “I wouldn’t say she’s completely in the clear, but things look more hopeful.”

  I’d become convinced she could hear me. When I spoke, I was sure she responded with a flicker of her eyelids or a twitch of her hands. I talked to her about the dog we’d adopt when the tour finished and about the happy life we’d have. I talked about all the fun things we’d done on this tour. We’d been dorky tourists, checking off to-do lists in every city. Weirdly enough, despite both of us having had a lifetime of travel, we’d never taken the time to actually see things in the cities we’d visited before this tour.

  This tour had given us time to relax and explore things. It made me glad I’d waited, because I got to see them with Fiona and create all those memories.

  I thought about singing to her again, but before I could, her hand moved.

  It most definitely moved.

  I jumped up. “Fiona? Fiona?” I squeezed her hand.

  Her eyelids didn’t just flicker; she opened her eyes and looked at me. I wasn’t sure if I should buzz for the nurse or stay with her.

  “Can you hear me?” I asked, and she squeezed my hand again.

  I gulped. This was definitely a good sign. I wanted to stroke her face, but the bandages made that difficult. I was so glad I was the one she saw first when she woke. She knew I was here with her and she wasn’t alone.

  I buzzed for the nurse.

  “She’s woken up,” I said when a nurse came. “She opened her eyes.”

  As the nurse bustled around, checking things, I didn’t take my gaze from Fiona’s face. She opened her eyes again, and this time she seemed to focus on me.

  “Matty?” Her voice was hoarse.

  “I’ll get some water,” the nurse said. “If she can drink it, that is.”

  “I’m here, Fi, and you’re going to be okay.”

  When the nurse returned, she had a tray. “I’ve got ice chips too, in case she can’t drink.”

  I took the jug from her and poured a glass of water, then held it to Fiona’s lips. I tried to keep my hand steady even though I shuddered with excitement. She’d woken up, and she’d said my name. From here on, she’d only get stronger and better.

  Her face twitched. “It hurts to smile,” she said.

  “You smile just fine. But you’re all bandaged up.”

  I didn’t want to tell her about the injuries to her face. Not yet. There were so many other things I wanted to tell her. She’d get better, and I’d make sure every day with her was the best day of her life. I couldn’t take a single one of those days for granted.

  Soon, she dozed off again.

  “She’ll be like this all day,” the nurse said.

  I sat by her bedside, talking and singing. After a while, Nurse Mary came back up.

  “You have to go to your room. The doctor wants to see about discharging you.”

  “But she woke up. What if she wakes again and I’m not here?”

  She put her hand on my shoulder. “It’s tough, but you want to get out of here, right? Anyway, you’re in that wheelchair, so you don’t have much choice.”

  I nodded and went with her. The doctor looked me over and said I’d be fine to be discharged. He gave me a sheet with a list of care instructions.

  After that, I got dressed in real clothes and went back up to Fiona’s room. Soon, I’d have to book a hotel and organize all that, but I wanted to stay with her for as long as possible.

  A little while later, she woke again. She wanted to say something, but she couldn’t speak. Her hands fluttered around, showing her distress. I tried to give her some water, but she couldn’t drink, so I called the nurse for more ice chips.

  “It’s okay,” I said, smoothing down her hair. “Relax. You can talk later.”

  When the nurse bought in the ice chips, I gave Fiona some. I sat on the bed beside her, still smoothing her hair.

  “Matty?” she said.

  “Don’t try to talk,” I told her. “Just rest.”

  She shook her head and reached for me. “Go back on tour,” she said.

  “It’s fine. The guys can play without me. They’ve gone to Barcelona, and I can join up with them later. The main thing is for you to get better. I’ve got all the time in the world to go on tour. Ri
ght now, I have to be with you.”

  But she’d fallen back asleep, and I wasn’t sure how much she’d heard of that.

  A little while later, another nurse came in. “We’re about to give her something to help her sleep, so you should get yourself organized.” She glanced at my bags. “Get some sleep and come back in later.”

  I hated leaving Fiona, but I didn’t have much choice with the nurse throwing me out. This hospital seemed to have the bossiest nurses I’d ever met.

  Chapter 7: Matty

  I BOOKED A ROOM AT the first hotel on the list. It was about five minutes’ walk from the hospital, but they made me take a cab.

  “Don’t push yourself too hard,” the doctor told me. “You’ll be weak for a few days.”

  I opened the cab door and was about to get in when my stomach clenched. It was only a short distance, but I did not want to get into that cab. Logically, I should be fine. What could happen on a five-minute drive down quiet streets? Still, my mind screamed at me not to get into that car.

  As I stood with the door open, half in the cab and half out, the driver yelled something in French. I had no choice but to get in.

  “Drive carefully,” I told the driver.

  He snorted and took off.

  I’d booked into the hotel for a week since I had no idea how long I’d be staying. When I got to my room, I opened the suitcases. I wanted to take out all of Fiona’s things. She might not want anything now, but I knew as soon as she started feeling better, she’d want her makeup and maybe some pretty things around her. I took out her sleep stuff and put it in a pile to take back to the hospital with me.

  I’d wanted to send the flowers Damo had brought in to her ward, but the nurse had said she couldn’t have them in ICU. Instead, they got taken to one of the old people’s wards. When Fiona got better, I’d fill her room with flowers. I’d send more flowers to the old people, too. It made me sad to think of people in hospital with no one to bring them flowers or visit.

  From my room, I had a view of the hospital. I wondered if I could see Fiona’s room from there.

  Even though the nurse had told me to rest, I didn’t think I’d be able to sleep. That freshly made bed called to me, though, and I figured a short kip wouldn’t hurt. When I lay down, the softness of the mattress seemed to embrace me—it was so soft after trying to sleep on the hard hospital bed. I wondered if I should get some kind of mattress topper for Fiona if her stay was going to be longer-term. That was the last thought I had before I fell asleep.

  When I woke, it was dark outside. How long had I slept? I’d only wanted an hour at the most. I checked my watch. Shit, I’d been out for five hours. I scrambled to get dressed and get back to the hospital. Not wanting to get into another cab, I walked the short distance. Rushed, more like it.

  “You look like hell,” the nurse said when I reached the ward. “You’ll be back in here if you don’t watch yourself.”

  I nodded. I felt a bit woozy too. “I slept. I slept too much. I should’ve set an alarm.”

  She tsked. “You obviously needed it. Don’t be too hard on yourself. You’re in this for the long haul, and it’s better to pace yourself. I know what I’m talking about. I’ve worked here a long time, and everyone wants to be with their loved ones every minute of the day, but you have to look after yourself first.”

  People kept telling me that, but I couldn’t stomach the thought of Fiona waking up alone. Why couldn’t they let me sleep in her room?

  “How has she been?” I asked.

  “Sleeping most of the time. She’s had some ice, and we gave her a sponge bath.”

  I handed the nurse Fiona’s sleep stuff.

  “Wow, she’s got some fancy things here,” the nurse said. “Much better than the ugly hospital gowns. Are you sure she’d want to wear them? They might get all messed up while she’s still in intensive care.”

  She didn’t elaborate on that, and I didn’t ask.

  “It’s fine,” I said. We can buy more.”

  The nurse put Fiona’s things away.

  “Matty?” Fiona opened her eyes again. She moved her arm a little, and I grabbed her hand.

  “I’m here.”

  Fiona nodded, then closed her eyes. She stayed like that for the rest of the day, drifting in and out of sleep. Dr. Roche did his rounds and said he was really happy with her progress.

  “When can she leave ICU?” I asked him.

  “I’m not sure yet. We’ll keep monitoring her, but maybe in the next day or so. I’m sure it will be much nicer for her to have a regular room and have some of her things around her. Nicer for you too.”

  Fiona woke again and looked around in confusion. “Where am I?” she asked.

  “You’re in the hospital,” I explained.

  She stared at me. “You should be on the tour,” she said again.

  “Things are under control,” I told her. “I’m here with you. Don’t worry about the tour.”

  She shook her head but drifted back to sleep.

  As I sat beside her, I knew that the chances of me going back on tour were almost nil. I wouldn’t leave Fiona, no matter what she said. My place was right here. There was no rock left in me.

  Chapter 8: Matty

  FIONA SEEMED EVEN STRONGER the next day. She stayed awake for longer periods and was less confused.

  “Can you get me a mirror?” she asked when she woke. “I must look a mess.”

  A cold shiver went through me. I hadn’t expected her to be that lucid, and no one had told her yet about the lacerations. Since bandages covered most of her face, she wouldn’t be able to see them, but even the bandages might stress her.

  “I don’t have one,” I said. “I’ll ask the nurse later. Do you want me to brush your hair?”

  She nodded.

  I moved to sit on the bed beside her. I didn’t want to push her over to make more room, so I perched with my butt on the edge of the bed. I took her hairbrush and began to gently brush her hair. It was difficult because the bandages covered some parts of her head, but I separated the chunks of hair that were free. I didn’t want to pull on her head or cause her any pain.

  “That’s nice,” she said. “Madeline used to brush my hair. Where’s Madeline?”

  “She’s busy with some other clients,” I said. “She might come to see you later.”

  I wasn’t sure where Fiona thought she was, or if she even realized we were still in Paris. I’d had a few messages from Madeline since I’d contacted her, asking for progress reports and sending her best wishes. There was no way she’d come to visit, though. As much as Madeline liked Fiona, business always came first with her, and a client who was no longer working wasn’t a priority in her books.

  As I brushed Fi’s hair, I sang to her.

  “I’ve always liked that song,” she said. “Remember when Ash’s mic screwed up?”

  I laughed. We were supposed to be lip-syncing during a TV performance, but someone screwed up and gave Ash a live mic. He could never lip-sync without singing under his breath, and that went to air, the song with his breathy singing like a ghost over the track. I had never been sure if it was an accident or if one of the crew had wanted to make him look like a dick.

  Funny that Fi remembered that. I’d long since forgotten it.

  “He was so angry about it,” I said. “He stomped around, swearing vengeance on the crew, but of course no one ever confessed to doing it.”

  I kept singing and brushing. When I got to the end of the song, I stopped. “Have you had enough? I don’t want to tire you out.”

  Fiona nodded. I lowered her bed and arranged her pillows so she could sleep. Then I went to the nurses’ station.

  “She wants a mirror,” I said. “I’m not sure if she should see herself at the moment.”

  The same nurse was on duty. Nurse Lucy. “You think it’ll stress her?” she asked.

  “I know it will.”

  “We’ll make sure no one take a mirror into the room, not until s
he’s more able to cope. After the bruising and swelling go down, it’ll look a lot better, too. The poor dear. I followed her modeling career. She was a stunning woman.”

  “She’ll always be a stunning woman,” I said. “She’s got a gorgeous heart. The public have rarely seen that side of her.”

  That side had sure never been covered in the media: her gentleness and sweetness. But there’d been plenty of stories about her being screwed up and trashed.

  “If she’s sleeping, you should slip downstairs and get something to eat,” Nurse Lucy said. “The food’s not half-bad down in the cafe. They do a decent cup of coffee, too. Maybe even grab a book or a magazine. It must get boring sitting at her bedside.”

  I didn’t want to disappear for too long, but maybe grabbing a sandwich and a coffee would be a good idea. I could bring something up to Fiona’s room for later, too.

  When I got down to the lobby, I had a bit of a look around. I’d only rushed through earlier. There were several places to eat, but only one that looked like a cafe. There was also a florist and another shop with all kinds of hospital needs.

  The woman in the cafe made me a coffee to go, and I grabbed a few things to eat, enough supplies to see me through the afternoon. I got one of the celebrity gossip magazines, too. Fiona liked to flip through them sometimes.

  I’d just gotten out of the elevator on Fiona’s floor when I heard a scream.

  That was her. I knew Fiona’s scream. I rushed to her room.

  Fiona was still lying in the bed, but tears streamed down her face. She had a mirror in her hand.

  A nurse, one I hadn’t seen before, stood by her bedside.

  I stepped into the room, and Fiona looked up.

  “Get out!” she screamed. “Get out, and don’t come back. Don’t ever look at me like this.”

  Hell, that nurse had given Fiona a mirror. She’d seen her injuries.